HOW TO:
Survive Miami Beach
Miami Beach– known all over the world for being one of the most popular beaches, nightlife, and vacation hotspots. There is so much more to Miami Beach than people think– it may be luxurious, but it can be tedious and annoying.
HAVE NO FEAR, WHERE TO NEXT IS HERE!
Below you will find the top ten tips on how to survive your Miami Beach experience without absolutely wishing you had never even gone in the first place. ​
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Wake up early!
The earlier you wake up, the earlier you get ready, the earlier you leave your house or hotel, the earlier you get to the beach, the fewer people there are, the more comfortable your setup will be! We LOVE the butterfly effect.
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2. Pack Food & Drinks
If you live in Miami, pack a cooler of your favorite snacks, cold cuts, drinks, and water, and bring it with you. If you are staying in a hotel, stop by a local grocery store, convenience store, or even gas station, and get some of your favorite goodies. In Miami Beach, they will literally charge you your left kidney for a water bottle and your right hemisphere for a bag of chips. Do not fall into the tourist trap and come prepared.
3. Sunscreen
Bring your sunscreen and reapply every two hours. The Miami Heat is no joke and neither is skin cancer, so please make sure you are guarded against those hella powerful UV rays. Even when it’s cloudy, it’s not. It’s a trick. The sun is coming. PROTECT YOURSELF.
4. Bring your own umbrella and towels.
Remember the body parts I mentioned you had to sell in order to get a water bottle and a bag of chips? Well, you’re going to have to sell yourself on Calle 8 if you want a towel and an umbrella. It is insanely expensive for no reason, it's a safer bet to take your ass to Wal-Mart and buy yourself a cheap one. And for tourists, it’s cheaper to buy an umbrella at Wal-mart too. Who cares if its a one time use? So is the one at the beach.
5. Bring a change of clothes
Nothing, and I repeat NOTHING is more uncomfortable than wet clothes full of sand. Miami is full of really amazing places and fun things to do after you get out of the beach and you wouldn’t want to be uncomfortable doing them. Even if you’re just going home or back to the hotel, it is well worth to pack dry clothes (and dry underwear)! You’ll thank us later.
6. Bring Music
At Miami Beach, music is essential. Whether you want to twerk, sing, or relax, a fire playlist is always the move. You might even be interested in our bad b*tch playlist HERE (make hyperlink). Bring a speaker, Bluetooth device, radio, your own band– whatever– and turn it up! It will make your experience so much more enjoyable and it will let you unwind and soak it all in.
7. Bring Wipes!
Please bring baby wipes/ cleansing wipes to get rid of that annoying sand before you get back in your car. You may want sandy cheeks, but you do not want sandy seats. There are showers available as you leave the beach, but we all know those NEVER get it all. Wipe yourself down for five minutes and you will relieve yourself of an awful headache after.
8. Do not go into the beach drunk, especially alone.
It’s not like I’m promoting bad behavior or anything, but day drinking is fun– especially at the beach with your gorls. Between the heat, the water, and the sand, it is so easy to get real lit real quick. We also know that the lit-ness triples once you enter the beach– so do not go in there while drunk! You will lose your pals and probably lose yourself while you’re at it. The current is strong and that liquor is stronger.
9. Drive Responsibly!
Make sure if you’re going to drink, you have a responsible designated driver that is in charge of bringing you back home safely. If you all want to drink, that’s not a problem– but UBER! Or if worst comes to worst, call your parents or your cool cousin to come to pick you up.
10. Have Fun!
You’re in Miami, BEACH! LET’S GET LOUD, LET’S GET LIT. You can’t survive Miami Beach without having fun and without having a good story to tell.